I went to my Houston Bloggers meeting last night. Normally a meeting that educates and energies me for the month.
I’d had a great day. My parents came to visit, we went to lunch and they gave me a new laptop as an “investment in my business” which, literally, brought me to tears. I took the kids to gymnastics after they went home and relished in my beautiful girls mastering the backward roll.
And then I headed out. Ready for a fun night of learning, consulting, and laughter.
And then… in the blink of an eye, I found something out that floored me and ruined my entire night.
I found out, for the second time this week, that a trust I had put in someone was broken. A trust that the information I was posting was accurate, unique, and a benefit to my readers and a group of people who certainly deserved it.
And right then, I quit blogging. I folded up my virtual posts, rolled my bandwidth into a ball, and stuffed my brand new laptop into a suitcase and mentally walked away. I fell into a blogging depression and it stayed with me the entire night.
Blogging can be wonderful. It can provide an outlet, a release, of sorts for those of us who share our personal lives. It can be uplifting and rewarding. It can be the only thing that holds me together on the really bad days.
But blogging is hard. And for those of us who really want to present the best content, the best blog we can, and as honestly as we can, stepping on as few toes as possible, it is a daily struggle.
A struggle for me that has included tears, immense doubts, and what can only be described as the depression of blogging.
The truth of the matter is that I do not know what I am doing. Not one little tiny bit. And I think I have, in the bell of the learning curve, set myself up to be confused, confusing, and just lost. I try to take as much advice as I can from people who know what they are doing and implement it in a way that works for me and what I think my readers want. I have to trust people to be as truthful and honest as I would be to them.
But every time I make a change, or add a new idea, I get slammed. I have been called a sell out, a copycat, and a spammer. To top it off, I have now been seriously burned by people I trusted.
All things that hurt. Especially from those I think are my allies.
Then there is the desire to see how I am doing in the blogosphere. Something I think a blogger should never do. Because there is always going to be a bigger blog. There will always be someone doing this for less time than I have that will have higher traffic, more opportunities, and a larger presence in social media. Especially if I know them, I am proud of them and their amazing accomplishments. But, to be honest, it is hard to watch some days. Hard not to feel inferior and unpopular. I think that is just human nature.
Most days, I am realistic about all of this. I know that as long as I put out good, honest, content and am true to myself, and share with my readers what interests me and might help them, I’ll be OK. I know that eventually, it will all work itself out and I will get to continue doing what I now have a passion for. Blogging.
But I also know that there will be more weeks like this one. Where I will make mistakes, put my trust in someone else, and let remarks made hurt me to the core. I know that there will be more days when I will want to pack it up and walk away. Where my hard work seems futile and my goals unreachable.
But until then, I suppose I will just keep on keeping on. I adore my readers and consider you a very, very special part of my life. I love telling you about my family, my children, and my highs and lows as a mother. I love knowing what I put on the page is going to be honest and affect someone who might think they are alone.
I love having a say about products and offering them to you and I know the majority of you appreciate it because you tell me you do. But I know it is a lot. And I know that some think I have sold myself to the monetizing bloggers of the world. And yes, it is nice to be paid for something that I love to do. Especially in times of financial struggle. But I am not in this for the proverbial paycheck. I am in it to make connections, make friends, and to give myself a place to talk.
I hope that shines through.
Because I truly love this blog and the people I have met through it. It would make me very, very sad to give in to the depression of blogging.
**originally published July 2011**
I know what you mean and I have a very small blog. I wanted to give up all things social media last weekend. But now Im back! keep your head up and just worry about you and your family. That is what is important!
Thank you Rachel! I am certainly trying to do that!! PS: I am always up
for a guest post from you :)
aww Thanks Lori!!!
I completely understand and I think my worse critique is myself. I never blog as much as I want and I am not growing the way I want because of it. But I am learning that I have to love my blog the way it is, until I have the time in my life to make it better.
Hang in there, because I love your blog and I have a feeling there are many others who do as well!
Thank you Shelley! I am trying to find the link to yours… can you send it so I can make sure I am reading the right blogs?
I do think we are our own worse critique. I try to stifle it but sometimes, well, I am only human :)
I am a Houston blogger, but I’ve never been to a meeting. You make me even more nervous to go to one now (plus they are all over on the other side of town from me)! I’m sorry you feel like you’ve been burnt by those you’ve trusted. I say just keep your head down and keep plugging away though.
Oh do not be discouraged by the meetings. They are fantastic and amazing
and an invaluable resource for us Houston Bloggers. I have gotten a TON of
opportunities in these meetings! What I found out had nothing to do with
the meeting, I just found out there! They are professionally run and an
amazing source of inspiration! I hope to meet you at one soon! :)
And thank you!
I’m a wimp! I am friends with Melissa from Melissa’s Bargain Blog and Heather from Living on Love & Cents. So maybe I’ll go to the next meeting they also attend!
I love Heather and Melissa!! Heather has never been – AHEM! Its the 3rd Thursday of the month! See you in August :)
I’m going to add on that the Houston Bliggers are amazing.
I’m glad you’re not going away. Just like I shared at the meeting, we all go through hard times where you are ready to give it up. Decide how you want to run your blog and do it that way! Because it’s yours!!!
I don’t mean to take over Lori’s comments but we’d LOVE to have you! Also if you just want to get your feet wet, we do a Twitter party every Thursday at 8pm so you can “meet” the bloggers, and it’s a way to connect for those who can’t make the meetings. Hashtag #houstonbloggers.
Thank you Lisa!! I can not believe how encouraging everyone is! I am here
for the long haul even of I have a wreck on the feeder! :D
Continue to be you! You are doing great! I’m sorry you were hurt by others. That is never easy and very discouraging.
Thank you Mandi!! With you guys by my side, I can brush it off a lot easier! :)
DO NOT be a stat slave! And it is difficult to be burned by those you trust. It hurts. Hold your head up and keep on keepin’ on! I know you can do it and you’ve already come so far. My inbox is always open for you, ya know.
OMG I know how you feel somedays I feel so discouraged!! multiple days without comments, no interest in my twitter class I worked so hard on etc.. tough days… makes it so hard to want to write anything of worth ya know??
Yes, I know! You should tell me about the twitter class! I would have FB
and Tweeted for you!
This is why I love your blog and you can not roll up your bandwidth and go away! :) You put into words the things that I feel, the insecurities I think many of us – bloggers and moms – face and are afraid to say out loud. Good for you. Keep it up! And woohoo for your parents & a new laptop! I am slowly working my way toward getting one too – just can’t stomach the price of an Apple and that’s what I really want.
I could have written this post word for word – seriously! I have been having the most rattastic two weeks and have had my trust torn to shreds, again :( I have also contemplated whether or not to stop, and it’s been hard getting out of this funk, really hard. I applaud you for writing this post, I for one could not put my thoughts together to vent it out in a post, but seeing your words has helped me realize that we all go through this and we all will get through it. *Hugs* to you!
Aww- thank you. What a kind comment. This is hard work because it is so
personal and we are just throwing ourselves out there with no net. But I
think, as long as we all support one another – and I have felt the support
today – we can get through it!! ((HUGS)) I hope next week is better for us
all!