Pretty much everyone knows what it is like to want to skip a day of school. You wake up and the covers feel incredibly soft and inviting….begging you to stay next to them for just a bit longer. Perhaps you have a tough test you want to avoid or a worse still, a bully. Kids can have a number of reasons to want to avoid school. Sometimes your child refuses school altogether.

As a mom, what do you do?

What to Do When Your Child Refuses School

Here are some thoughts to consider that I have learned from my experience and study on the subject:

Remember that kids naturally like school

It might sound nuts, but a young child that dislikes school is almost always a child that has a hidden struggle. Kids are generally going to love school until it becomes hard in some way. That time comes at various points for various children. Some even go all the way to high school or college before that moment hits. The point is, if your kid is suddenly not liking school, it is time to investigate and find out what challenge they are facing.

Communication is everything

It can’t be stated enough that we should be talking to our kids about their day constantly. Kids that have an open line of communication will generally open up at some point. They may not right away, but if you are constantly giving them the chance to get it off their chests, they will eventually want to say something. This is our best shot at staying on top of the bullying thing and is particularly effective when they are having trouble in class.

Stay in close contact with the teachers…all of them

Yes, that includes the teacher you don’t particularly care for. Everyone has personality conflicts somewhere along the way and that is cool, as long as you both have your child’s best interests in mind. If you are not getting that, start moving up the chain for command until you get results. Touch base with the teachers on a regular basis and let them know that you will be around and you are plugged in to what your kid is doing. Great teachers will love you for it and bad teachers will improve because of it.

Share your own stories

Kids love to hear about mom or dad’s mistakes and we should not be so arrogant that we are afraid to share them. When I share my mistakes, my kids open up in a whole new way. It is easy for our kids to see us as perfect for a time and letting them see our flaws can open them up and help them understand that life is not always perfect.

If kids are struggling or not wanting to go to school, you need to make sure you do some serious digging. Finding the reason is going to ultimately lead to the solution you are looking for. Paying attention, staying plugged in and staying in close touch will get you the information you need to know.