Something is wrong.  I do not have any idea what it could be.  But I woke up this morning with that horrible anticipatory feeling in my belly that generally means something is wrong.

I took the girls to school this morning.  Everything was well.  I kissed Sarah and she went off happily.  Katie ran into her classroom and I did not get a chance to kiss her good bye, though I went back and looked in and she was happily huddled with her teachers so I assume she is okay.  I pray that this feeling has nothing to do with her and that I do not regret not going in and kissing her.

Megan is fine.  A little runny nose but fine.  She is here with me and so I know I can take care of her.  So I do not think this feeling relates to her.

I just heard from my husband so I know he is safely tucked into his desk.  And as long as he stays there, barring some building issue, he is safe.

I suppose it could be finances.  I did balance the checkbook last night and that always brings eternal fear to me.  Especially since I am anticipating in upwards of $1000 on our electric bill.  At a time when it is really inconvenient.  Isn’t that the way it always is?

I don’t know.  But I don’t like this feeling.  To add to it, one of the girls teachers and I were talking this morning about when Megan would start preschool.  I told her my gut said to wait until she was 3, like Katie was.  And we got into a whole discussion about how our motherly gut instincts were generally right.

That added to my anxiety.

I feel light headed, like I could vomit, and like a crushing weight is on my chest preventing adequate oxygen levels.

I have had this feeling before and it eventually dissipates.  I have had it and something has happened.

So, I guess I’ll just sit and wait for my gut feeling to explain itself.  But the wait might just kill me!