I am a stay at home mom.  My job is to spend quality time with my children.  Period.  That is the point of being a stay at home mom after all, isn’t it?  And though it is a good thing and 97.685% of the time, I am happy to spend this time with my children, there are days where we spend entirely too much quality time together.

This weekend, my husband went out of town.  I am glad he did.  He has a very stressful job and a very stressful home life…  maybe I add to that but shhh…  don’t tell him I know that – so a quick trip away is all right with me.  Plus, payback is imminent.

So, rather than having the help when he gets home to wrangle the kids, I am flying solo.

And I am all ready for him to come home.

Now.

Right now.

5 minutes ago.

My children seem to sense that I have no back up.  No louder voice, no safety net.  The whining has reached fever pitch, the disobedience tested to the nth degree.  The sauciness putting even a teenage actress to shame.  I have pulled out the big guns to no avail.  They think time out is fun, their rooms are a fort and toys are taken away for sport.

It’s.been.fun.

Originally when this weekend was planned, I was excited.  I could have some friends over, put the kids to bed early, have some adult beverages and just relax a little.  I forgot that my children don’t sleep, know when I have time to relax and aim to ruin it as quickly as possible and adult beverages make me either tired, or want more.  Much more.  And I can’t have much more…  in case someone needs me.

I really thought, as if this were my first time emceeing a circus, that I would be able to get the house clean, do the laundry, cook some meals to freeze and get a daily shower.  Your laughter shows that you understand that I was in a trance when I dreamed up this fairy tale.  If I can’t get that done on a daily basis with my husband coming home at night, what chance do I have of getting it done with him gone?

I did have friends over.  Obviously good friends who find complete chaos and lack of sleep the perfect antidote for a boring weekend.  And the kids did do pretty well both nights.  The first night, Sarah only woke my friend a few times to take her to the bathroom.

I was so proud.

Last night, all six kids, mine and my friends, were asleep by 9:30pm.  I know!  Party central, right?

Except that we were too tired from taking care of them so we tried to go to bed.  Megan woke an hour later and was up until 2am and Sarah kept getting up and saying her tummy hurt and Katie came into bed with me.  Between my friend and I, we split half of a good night sleep.

But today has been the creme de la creme of behavioral issues.  I’ve spent most of the day looking for a way to escape to a beach where no children are allowed.  I can not figure out how to do it without alerting authorities so I have bitten the bullet, and the therapeutic Oreo, and stuck it out.

My house is a disaster, the laundry is not done, my kids need baths, I have no food ready for the week and I finally showered with all three kids this afternoon.  The neighbors called to thank me.

My husband is finally on his way home, delayed an hour due to storms, but on his way.  My knight in shining support, the apple of my rolling eyes, the one to remind me that they are babies and one day I will miss them.

And all of this quality time we are getting to spend together.