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Single Moms Do Not Automatically Raise Crappy Kids

I was finally relaxing after an insane day yesterday. I had sent the kids off to their weekly two hour dinner with their dad and was warmly curled up on the couch, tablet in hand for Candy Crush domination, and flipped on the television. There was not much on but I settled on a show that was talking about kids and the internet and the dangers. It was a story piece highlighting several kids that had gotten killed as a result of online interactions. Fully aware that this show would confirm that my kids will not get on social media until they are 21, a recurring comment kept coming up that annoyed the living crap out of me. ‘He/ she was raised in a single mom home, parents divorcing when they were younger.’ Further conclusions about the ‘typical’ single mom household being unstable and leading to low self esteem which led to bad decisions that got them killed really got me angry.

Single Moms Do Not Automatically Raise Crappy Kids [Read more…]

Teen Dating – What Age Is The Right Age?

“But mooom, he looked so HOT!’ is the same as nails on a chalkboard to me. I don’t want to hear that and I don’t want to face this. But it is going to happen. My daughters are going to come to me and ask about dating. Every parent faces it and we can’t avoid it. They will look up at me with those sparkly eyes and beg. They will plead. They will do every thing in their power to convince me that they are different and that there is nothing to fear. Teen dating is coming and I can feel it in my gut….sneaking around the corner of life like a serpent ready to strike. Despite the fact that I have told them they can not date until they are 30, the reality is that it can not be avoided with my overly protective motherhood style.

So, admitting that it will happen…what do I do about it? What is the right age for teen dating?

Teen Dating - What Age Is The Right Age? [Read more…]

Sex Education and School – A Lethal Blend?

As much as I want to avoid the topic of sex with my three girls, the reality is that if they don’t learn about it, they may have issues as they grow. The fact is that I want them well informed and confident in their knowledge. Along with my own process of getting to ‘the talk’, sex education is something that schools seem to take rather seriously these days and perhaps that is a good thing. They are focused on raising awareness and making things better for our kids. I am all for that aspect. Like most things that are good, there are some questionable bits, though. I was informed that schools today that hold these classes do some rather odd things. For example…

Would you be okay with the school:

…..teaching your child how to put a condom on a banana?

…..Going over the various types of sex…in detail?

……talking over the various types of lubricants and the types of sex they are good for?

Sex Education and School - A Lethal Blend? [Read more…]

Why I Rescued a Disabled Dog: Meet Jack

I was sitting here two weeks ago today flipping through my emails, attempting to get my inbox below 2000 when an invitation from the Houston Beagle and Hound Rescue to a Yappy Hour. I could not attend the party but I wanted to donate money to them. They had rescued a lot of dogs lately and paid out of pocket for some expensive surgeries. Considering I had rescued 6 year old Piper just last year from them, I figured I could certainly help.

Why I Rescued a Disabled Dog: Meet Jack [Read more…]

Teaching Your Kids the Importance of Each Day

Each day that we spend on this planet is an opportunity and a gift. Nobody is promised tomorrow and as such, we should learn to be thankful for every moment that we are here. Most of us at least know this simple lesson on some level, whether we adhere to it or not. Those of us that don’t really stick to it probably never really thought about it until we were much older. It got me to thinking…could this be a link? Could it be that kids that are exposed to “day appreciation” end up happier and more appreciative of each day? Is this where all those “happy people” come from?

Teaching Your Kids the Importance of Each Day [Read more…]

Teaching Kids To Solve Their Own Problems

When a kid makes a mistake, it is our natural instinct as parents to fix it. Fixing problems is one of our gut level functions as a mommy. See the boo-boo, fix the boo-boo…but are we crippling our kids when we take over like that? The ability to solve problems is a very important life skill. Kids that never learn to solve problems are destined to struggle in life.

Teaching Kids To Solve Their Own Problems [Read more…]

How Male Breast Cancer Held Me Hostage… Almost

Written by Series Guest Blogger, Brooks Weatherspoon, a father of twin 12 year old girls that will give us insight into A Day in Fatherhood!

Cancer….This is not a word that I ever wanted to see associated with my name. Yet, there it was hanging on the edge of the doctor’s lips. I heard the cancer part but missed the rest of what he was saying entirely. He also said the words male, breast and possibility. The word cancer drowned all of that out for the first go round. The doctor almost seemed to realize that and repeated the phrase a few times to wake me up to what he was saying.

After my heart rate slowed down a little and I started to actually listen, I realized that I was not on death’s door just yet…merely sneaking a peek. It appeared that the pains I had been experiencing for months in my chest area and armpits as well as the shortness of breath were not simply going to be ignored and blown off as simple muscle strains. Apparently the doctor felt things that needed to be checked.

But for male breast cancer? Really?

How Male Breast Cancer Held Me Hostage... Almost [Read more…]

Being Single on Valentine’s Day Can be a Blessing

Single women get the shaft on Valentine’s Day, let’s be honest. This holiday has become all about candy and roses and solidifying the love we have with another person. But some of us simply find the constant barrage of hearts, candy and flowers to be nothing more than a reminder that we won’t indulge in those things. Now, let’s get one thing straight, almost none of us are bitter. Nor do we want to be with someone for the sake of Valentine’s Day, simply to be miserable the rest of the year. In fact, I would rather be alone any day of the week versus being in a bad marriage. But after a while, the intense advertising and posting of bouquets and such on social media gets a little taxing.

Being Single on Valentine's Day Can be a Blessing [Read more…]

Shielding My Daughters and Lessons Learned – Daddy Edition

Written by Series Guest Blogger, Brooks Weatherspoon, a father of twin 12 year old girls that will give us insight into A Day in Fatherhood!

In the world of parenting, what we think is correct is often incorrect. Some of us learn this the hard way, and others learn from experience of a loved one. Pretty much every child will face life lessons at some point. Being a kid is tough! My twin daughters had a rough start in life because they were premature…born at only 25 weeks! When they finally came home it was a series of therapists and surgeries for a number of years and then further help when school started. Ultimately, they grew into the vibrant and healthy 12 year old girls they are today.

Shielding My Daughters and Lessons Learned - Daddy Edition [Read more…]

What I Learned About Marriage After My Divorce

I have never been a fairy tale girl. I have always known that things are not always as they seem. Blame it on my childhood or just on my internal make-up, but I did not want to get married or have kids for many, many years. Despite my adoptive parents 45+ year happy marriage, I knew that loss happened, pain happened and deceit happened in most relationships. At least the ones I had. So when I met my ex-husband, I was not looking for forever. Fresh off a broken heart from someone who I thought cared about me, I let a man in that has no right to be there. I was a successful stockbroker with a desire to travel and explore life. I owned my own home, car, had no debt and could pretty much do as I pleased. He was an hourly construction worker who had never had his own home, apartment, checking account or car. Everything he had, someone else had given him. Much like he is today, he never was able to hold his life together on his own. A complete and total opposite of me.

What I Learned About Marriage After My Divorce [Read more…]

How to Keep Our Emotional Baggage Off Our Kids

As a mother, one of the things I struggle with the most is making sure I give my kids the best chance possible emotionally. Something as simple as a passing comment can have lasting effects on a child and poor emotional habits are easily adopted as well. Finding the balance needed to keep my emotional baggage (and others as well) off of my children has been a very direct focus of my parenting mantra. To be fair, I have had my wins and losses with this. We all are going to make mistakes and say or do things we wish our kids had not witnessed. Still, my parenting North Star has always been to go back to this and I do my best.

How to Keep Our Emotional Baggage Off Our Kids [Read more…]

Tips for Solving Mother Daughter Relationship Problems

As a mother one of the toughest things you will ever do is challenge your daughter. Mothers and daughters are often at odds as they grow up and it is most often because the mother is trying to save them some type of pain. Any loving mother wants their kids to have it easier than they did. It is natural and logical in every way to a mother. The problem is, the daughter is not seeing it through a mother’s eyes. The daughter is seeing it through the child’s eyes.

Tips for Solving Mother Daughter Relationship Problems

Getting those visions in sync is the biggest key to solving mother daughter relationship problems I am finding. Making that happen is a tricky thing indeed. Here are some tips I have come up with that can help you along the way:

Pay attention to your own words before you say them.

It is rather easy to blurt out things on the spur of the moment and they make perfect sense to you. The truth is, the majority of what we say could be said better. We have to take the time and consider what our child is likely to hear. We have to ask ourselves what message we are sending with the words we are delivering. Sounds like a ton of work, right?

Not at all. A few extra moments of time to smooth out our delivery can be the difference between an hour of discussion and a quick and easy request.

Listen carefully to what they are saying and then hear them as a child

This is something that I am still working on but I am getting better. Our voice as kids is still inside us and we can still tap into it when we try. The key is to take a few moments to soak up what our daughter is saying to us and hear it through that voice. Chances are they are trying to tell us something or deliver a message that is garbled by our own experiences. We are filtering everything through a grown up existence full of experience and correction. They are often speaking from a very different place.

Learn the art of compromise

We as parents can compromise and not lose our authority in the least. Many parents think that compromise is a sign of weakness when it is actually a strength that our world needs more of. The key is to know when to use it. With mother daughter relationship problems, you are often looking at a number of issues. Concede some issues that are harmless and that you know you need to work on. Give in on some things to show that you are fully aware of your own shortcomings and they will be far more likely to listen to the things you won’t concede or compromise.

Taking the time to invest in your daughter’s concerns is key to working through these problems. If you can do this, you will be building a future of communication that will benefit you both.

What ideas do you all have to solve mother daughter relationship problems?

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5 Great Lessons A First Pet Can Teach Your Kid

A first pet can have a lasting impression on a child. There is a pretty good chance that you remember your first pet as a kid. Most of us do. Our first pets are special and they stick with us for a lifetime. One of the reasons why first pets have such an impression on us is because it is our first opportunity to care for something other than ourselves. This relationship can be a very special one and can teach our kids a ton of great lessons. Here are five examples for you to consider:

5 Great Lessons A First Pet Can Teach Your Kid

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When the Morning Routine Leaves you in Tears

I walked back from the bus stop dragging two scooters and a bicycle feeling them well up inside me. The frustration and angst that I struggled to hold down were pressuring the tears to release themselves. As I walked, fallen leaves scattering under my feet as if in fear, I listened to the roll of the plastic scooter wheels on the concrete. I would not let them out. I was a mother, after all, and we all have days that make us want to cry. I walked in the house, depositing the kids riding toys along with the others, making a mental note to make them clean up the pile of metal and wheels when they got home, and entered the house. When I promptly stepped on a small, hard plastic, character and screamed out in pain, I lost the battle with my tears.  When the Morning Routine Leaves you in Tears how do you go on? How do you deal with the frustration and still be productive?

When the Morning Routine Leaves you in Tears [Read more…]

Mother Daughter Date Night Ideas for Valentine’s Day

Putting together the perfect mother daughter date night on Valentine’s Day is a ton of fun. You can go in so many directions and really make it a special memory. Spending that type of quality time with your daughter on a day like Valentine’s Day makes it even more special. Here are five really fun ideas to try out the next time you spend a mother daughter date night together on Valentine’s Day:

Mother Daughter Date Night Ideas for Valentine's Day [Read more…]

My Lack of Sleep Might Kill Me

I watched Dr. Oz yesterday and I think I am truly scared!  Women who do not get at least 5 hours of sleep a night are twice as likely to have a heart attack as those who do?

Well chalk me into the heart attack corner.

My Lack of Sleep Might Kill Me [Read more…]

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